things I lost in the move

THE FROG WAS LIVING INDOORS IN THE PEACE LILY!  I found it this morning and forced it to step on to a pamphlet that I deposited to the tomato plants on the balcony. After about ten minutes, I retrieved the frog (via the pamphlet) and placed it in the herbs because I thought it would have a better chance of finding a cool little hamlet of water and shade there. At the heat of the day, I saw it out in the elements, exposed to the harsh afternoon sun. I haven’t seen it since. I have not heard it croak. It only got hotter this afternoon and my guess is that it committed suicide off my second story balcony. Secretly, I was hoping it would be my new friend, that it would do that thing that frogs can do where it develops male (or female) parts and reproduces on its own, growing a little family of frogs who live in the ample foliage I have created on my balcony. I looked around, poked around the soil, lifted pots–no sign of the frog.

I am considering buying a new computer. I say  this with a single, hot tear of sadness trickling down my cheek. I have never bought a brand new computer. This is unexpected and I have not done my research. I’ll probably end up buy what’s cheapest or on sale at Wal-Mart. Seriously, I don’t need much in a computer. I need speed. I need internet. I need a gazillion Word documents. I need a pictures and music, and when it comes to pictures and music, I actually think I need less space than the average computer user. I’m definitely not filling up the old hard drive with porn and gaming. Any advice on this front is welcomed, although please keep my needs in mind. Also, should I buy something used off of Craigslist?

I bought a ten dollar power cord today and tried to fire up the old beast that has been my computer since freshman year and officially since I got it in the divorce from my first college roommate. It started up once, but the mouse and keyboard didn’t work. So, I started it up again, and since then it has not gone past the Dell intro. I plan on taking it to the computer people here at WSU tomorrow. I’ll see what they can do. They will probably tell me to chuck it, but people have been telling me that for years and by golly it’s gotten me through way longer than anyone ever thought it would. (Hot tear slides down other cheek.) At the very least I must take out the hard drive. How does one dispose of a computer?

If I get a new one, there is also the question of laptop vs. desktop. I love my laptop. I use it as a desktop mostly. But, I’m not sure if the keyboard of the laptop is as ergonomical as it could be for writing dissertations. Plus, I get the feeling that the laptop is shooting invisible, cancer-causing rays into my boobs, or uterus, depending on how I position the computer.

I found a mouse turd on my counter today. Prematurely, in my brain (because I have no one to talk to) when I moved in I exclaimed: “This place seems clean! For once this is a kitchen that doesn’t gross me out! I could cook here!” But now–the mouse turd–and everything has changed. First, maybe it wasn’t a mouse turd. Maybe it was from the frog. This is something I can handle, although I have a vague idea that frog turds look more like owl turds than mice turds in that they are sort of a bladder bag filled with the bones and cartilage of whatever the frog last consumed–exoskeletons of bugs, maybe. I have no hard knowledge to back this up.

In my brain (because there is no one to talk to) I have been saying “ass loads” a lot. This makes me miss Isaiah because with him there were always ass loads of things: ass loads of ketchup packets, ass loads of smog, ass loads of chicken garlic pizza, etc. And it occurs to me that all of this posting is the stuff that I would normally unload on him every night. Like, he would come home from work and absently play guitar or cuddle me as I chattered chattered chattered about the details of my day. He would nod and listen and avoid the places where I would try to trick him into an argument. In so many ways, we were playing out very stereotypical gender roles.

But back to the mouse turd, I have searched it out and there appears to be no way that a mouse could get on that counter, unless he has a hand glider. My hope is that it was a tiny burnt piece of rice, or some unfortunate looking particle that fell off some legitimate food source. Or, it is a actual mouse turd that some how made it on to my counter from when my stuff was in storage. Or, it is a real mouse turd from a mouse infestation here in my very own apartment. Lets hope it’s not the latter two. Lets hope that frog dumped a big ol’ Cleveland steamer right on my counter top next to the bowl of fruit.

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