Monthly Archives: June 2011

ouch ouch ouch!

Ok, now I’m sad and lonely. Fortunately, I’ve got a few weeks of distractions ahead of me, but then what?

Anyway, awhile back, my massage therapist asked if sleep was restful for me. I was almost surprised by how quickly I answered, “No!” No, not at all. Although I perceive that I sleep solidly through the night, I wake up feeling tense and exhausted. I grind my teeth and tense my shoulders. I wake up feeling like a I’ve been fighting all night. Stress does seem to exacerbate the problem, but even without overtly stressful conditions, this is pretty much the norm.
In my adult life, I’ve been picky about sleep. I require complete stillness and quiet of my bed partners. If they can’t maintain a tolerable level of silence, I have to kick them out. For that reason, I’ve always thought of myself as a light sleeper. I always thought I got a better night’s sleep alone. However, I realized that during the past few weeks, my sleep was restful and peaceful, and I was at ease when I woke up. Sure, maybe I didn’t get the entire 9 hours of sleep I prefer, but the hours I did get were quality hours. It seems that having a body in bed next to me, or rather, the right body in bed next to me, does wonders to calm my energy and give me a peaceful night’s sleep.

Getting to bed earlier.
Spending less time online.
Waking up earlier and happier as the sunrise turned us all red.
Reading me my favorite stories at night.
Eating better (and more).
Cooking.
Foucault.
Afternoons with strong margaritas and full bellies.
Sunbathing on a giant rock by the river.
The necessity of cliff jumping to prove one’s love.
Bicycle rides in the sun.
Yoga in the mornings.
Walking through sunset and beyond on the longest days of the year.
The t-shirt that still has his smell.
I could get used to him.