Category Archives: existence

Women Talking by Miriam Toews

My latest read was Women Talking by Miriam Toews. I did not see the film, but heard about the horrifying real-life premise, and it really stuck with me. This book was excellent yes, but I do have more to say about it.

This is a dialogue-heavy book. And those are tough, imho. It actually is mostly “women talking.” Most of the book struck me as a kind of feminist 12 Angry Men, and that was exciting to me. Toews pulls off the heavy dialogue, though it must have been no easy task. Toews was also able to draw out the unique qualities of the characters in a fairly limited space. Furthermore, Toews is particularly well-positioned to write this book, based on her own Mennonite background. She is able to draw on the kinds of religious philosophy in a way that felt very real to me as a reader.

[Spoiler] (though I still think the book would be worth reading): The book is narrated by a male character, August, who is a troubled young man and village teacher of the local young men. He is also a victim of the same oppressive culture of men that has also preyed upon these women. He takes notes during the women’s meetings. (The women are not allowed to learn to read and write, so they cannot take notes themselves.) At first, it seems powerful that the women cannot take their own notes, and August’s presence serves as a reminder of that. He also helps add some drama and intrigue.

However, by the end of the book, the emotional landscape really shifts to August entirely. On one hand, this is the reality for so many women’s lives: their story is not told, except maybe through the perspective of men. I was cheering this book on, as one that was still able to center women’s voices and dialogue throughout. In the end, though, I felt that the story became August’s story, and I am willing to entertain the notion that this is just the framing, and this is just how it is, and this can still be a feminist account, but as a reader, I wanted it to end differently. I wanted it to end through the lenses and perspectives of the women.

If you read it, tell me if you loved the ending, or if you wanted something different.

Kairos by Jenny Erpenbeck

The reviews and the title made me read Jenny Erpenbeck’s book, Kairos. Indeed, this is a complicated and well-written book. It is about a relationship between a very young woman and a much older man. The romance between the two is intense and heady. Most people with a beating heart in their chest will recognize these feelings, and both of these main characters are able to fully express the intensity of their love. The book is also set against the backdrop of Germany in the 1980s.

Slowly, over the course of the book, the relationship ages and the characters’ feelings change in their complexity, and that is, I think, meant to parallel the political changes occurring in Germany as well.

The book also has deep political, cultural, and artistic references throughout. Unfortunately, I read the book at a time when I could not give it my full attention, and this is definitely a book that requires a close read in order to pick up what felt to me like dense literary references and subtle commentary. Honestly, I also had a hard time with the heavy themes. I think in another era, I might not be so fazed by them because it is all very well-done.

Salvage the Bones by Jesmyn Ward

This summer I read Salvage the Bones by Jesmyn Ward. Ward is on all kinds of must read lists, but this is the first chance I’ve had to read her work. I was impressed. I don’t necessarily care about basketball or dog fighting per se, but Ward made me care about it all, deeply. The human drama and the nuance were absolutely on point. I look forward to reading more of her work.

Interestingly, last summer, I read Their Eyes Were Watching God, which also features a hurricane, the 1928 Okeechobee Hurricane, I believe, which killed thousands. Similarly, Salvage the Bones features Hurricane Katrina. Surely Ward was influenced by Zora Neale Hurston as she wrote this book, and if she was, her work represents a kind of imitation of the best possible sort.

Both books function simultaneously as fiction, historical fiction, and literary fiction. This is an approach I love (when it can be found) because the history is there (you are learning something), but also the prose is right (it is literary prose), and it’s fiction–there is an engaging sense of plot. Once again, I am delighted that these writers exist in the world, that publishers recognize them, and that they are accessible to us all. It’s a public service, really.

Witches, Midwives, and Nurses by Barbara Ehrenreich and Deirdre English

I read Witches, Midwives, and Nurses: A History of Women Healers, by Barbara Ehrenreich and Deirdre English, for my book project, but ended up reading it like one of my recreational reads, so I’m including it here. In my opinion, this is a book that should still be taught in medical classes to this day. Although it was originally published in 1973, this brief history–and the justified rage–are still relevant and important for everyone to understand to this today.

The long history of the witch trials are placed in context next to how babies came to be delivered (mostly by men) in modern medicine. The history is portrayed as a hostile takeover. While science improved some aspects of maternal medicine, the losses and violations from extracting women from childbirth seemed to exceeded any sense of progress.

This book, sometimes referred to as a “pamphlet,” is a kind of manifesto that offers a scathing, but not inaccurate account of the history of sexism in medicine.

Fleishman Is in Trouble

Awhile back, everyone was raving about the show Fleishman Is in Trouble, and I meant to watch it, but never got the chance. So, when I saw the book, Fleishman Is in Trouble by Taffy Brodesser-Anker, I decided to read it, and I’m so glad I did.

This was an excellent book–one of those human dramas that had great character building and, well, drama. I found the book to be real, intense, and human. It is a very “peoply” book, meaning that it is all people, and characters, and dialogue all the time, and normally that kind of wears me out, but in this case, I could handle it.

As you know, I’ve read a few popular titles in the past year, and this one has much more literary merit that your typical piece of pop fiction. All of that said, it is possible that this book is not for you, but I think you’ll know that immediately upon reading the blurb. If you do read it, and you’re intrigued, go grab this book, and tell me what you think!

And now, I really need to go back and watch the show!

Self Care by Leigh Stein

Self Care by Leigh Stein is a scathing, scathing cultural critique. I really enjoyed it, and I think you will too. On one hand, this novel functions as a plot driven story, with some interpersonal insights, relationships, and drama throughout, and a plot that moves along nicely. However, on the other hand, it also working on the level of cultural critique in a way that is deeply insightful. I have not read such a wise critique of women and social media ever.

The characters are, on every level and in every action, hashtag influenced. These women are smart, insightful, and good at their jobs, but, much like Stein’s own social media account (which I thoroughly enjoy), it is sometimes unclear if we’re working in a real life drama or a comedic cultural critique. As for the social media account, it is clearer (to me) that Stein is working in satire, but in the book, Self Care, it is not so obvious. The actions and beliefs of many of the characters will be funny/ridiculous to most readers (and also sad and tragic), but the main characters seem to be fully and unironically immersed in the work and the drama.

I do not say this often, but I think this novel would work well in a college class. It is light, and entertaining, and very readable, but the themes are so very relevant to the feminist and the contemporary human experience. Go read it, and let me know what you think!

Separation Anxiety by Laura Zigman

My second real “pop” book of this year, after Modern Lovers, is Separation Anxiety by Laura Zigman. If I recall, I found this book referenced on Instagram, I added it to my Libby list, and, lo and behold, had time for it when my turn came up on the app. This is a summer read? A beach read? I’m not really sure of the genre, but as popular books go, it was pretty good, had some good depth, unexpected twists, and the writing was solid.

I found the main character to be a little too cold, shutdown, and removed in a way that did not feel like great “main character energy,” but the rest was pretty good. I also found the conflict between the central couple to be a bit unrealistic. The guy seems…pretty decent actually. So, why is the main character so repulsed by him? Why are they separating? The reason is stated, but never quite believable. I think there’s sort of an East Coast cultural difference may be at play here.

I appreciated the themes and the artful movement through scenes and the way Zigman built clear, and direct meaning throughout. I found some of the concepts to be repulsive, but in the end, none of it was gratuitous. I don’t think it is a spoiler to share that the main character begins wearing her dog in a baby sling, and, honestly, at the end, I’m still not sure if I should be concerned for this fictional dog’s wellbeing. And there’s more of the same throughout.

The Way of Integrity by Martha Beck

The Way of Integrity by Martha Beck was another “Oprah pick” that I listened to via audiobook. In it, Beck uses the framework of Dante’s Inferno to organize her own self help book. I have noticed this method with the other self help books, and, as a framework, my critique is…okay, fine, why not?

The book is full of examples from life coach clients and Inferno, but the strongest moments are when she writes about her own life and her own experiences. I have not read her other works, but it sounds like she’s written extensively about her personal life, so maybe that’s why it does not figure more prominently in this book. Even still, I would have loved to learn more about her own experiences, and how she continues to wrestle with, or overcome her own problems.

Interestingly, she writes about important issues in her own life, issues that sound incredibly difficult to navigate, but she writes about these issues with a calm, removed, even cool, understanding. Calmness is important and helpful and helps convey that she has resolved these difficult issues–she has processed them and moved on. However, sometimes her tone is even sort of droll and eye-rolly about her own painful experiences. I do not blame her for not writing about the stuff that is not entirely healed and processed. Not at all. Don’t do it. However, I would like to hear a bit more of navigating challenges during the process, while the thing is still “in process.” Just a thought. Maybe she’ll do that. Maybe someone else will.

Overall, Beck seems skills at quickly assessing and distilling people’s issues into manageable work that can be healed and overcome. That’s nice. That’s hopeful.

When: The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing by Daniel H. Pink

(Yes, audiobooks have entered the chat.) I recently finished When: The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing by Daniel H. Pink. This was an interesting book that was full of tidbits all loosely connected to the idea of timing. Pink pulls from every imaginable study on timing and presents them in the book, adding lots of his own examples and anecdotes.

While some will call this a kind of pseudoscience and others may find the content to be too broad or too common, I think Pink balances enough really interesting information on timing throughout to engage readers. I have already found myself sharing anecdotes from the book in the days since I finished it.

I think I might also be feeling some “life-hacking” or “bio-hacking” fatigue lately and sometimes just want to “let the soft animal of my body love what it loves.” However, I have to admit that in the past, I’ve known and used some of the tactics he mentions in the book, and there has definitely been a benefit. I think it’s worth the read, especially if you’re on an uptick in life and feeling motivated to improve.

Anatomy of the Spirit by Caroline Myss

Next up in my series in the self-help genre was Anatomy of the Spirit by Caroline Myss. I have read, or skimmed (or was supposed to read?) Myss in the past–I can’t quite remember–but either way, this book was familiar. In it, Myss compares the Eastern concept of the seven chakras to the Catholic concept of the seven sacraments.

Peronally, I am much more familiar with the chakras than I am with the seven sacratments. But, based on my limited understanding, I thought the comparison was often clunky, especially in regards to the first three chakras and first of the seven sacraments. Sure, both are seven, and sure, seven is considered a sacred number across many traditions, but beyond that, the comparisons often felt like a stretch.

Myss, like many of the gurus in The Wisdom of Sundays, has to hedged her integration of an Eastern tradition into her practice or theory. I find this kind of hedging to be kind of sad and frustrating. On one hand, it can dumb down the content, and on the other hand, I am just baffled and disappointed about what this says about society’s ability to hold on to complex and/or competing ideas. Still, I suppose these baby steps are necessary. Either way, while I was sometimes weary of Myss’s use of Christianity as a foundation for the philosophies in ways that did not feel productive, I still found a lot of wisdom in her words. There are many nuggets of truth to be had here.